Running

Running seems like such a good idea to me.

Today I tried to wear jeans for the first time in a couple of weeks (I'd been wearing skirts cause of the heat) and they didn't really fit at all. Which confuses me, because I've been doing MORE walking than during the summer..but not as much as Italy I guess. I bought a membership to the RSF....now I just have to MAKE TIME to GO TO THE GYM. I say this too often but seeing as my main relationship is currently with NSU, there is some hope that I might actually force myself to go every once in a while.

In other parts of my life...the idea of escaping and running away is somewhat attractive. I don't really know why I feel so trapped, but at the moment, I do. Lack of control is probably the main factor. Which is odd, because I kind of gave up trying to control things when I was in Europe. In reality, I have more control over my life than I did last year at Cal. I make a lot more decisions. I control a lot more things (to a certain extent). I can choose to attend or not attend a lot of things. And, I have been generally choosing not to attend things. (and actually my antisocial tendancies do not make me feel liberated at all.) But as I've taken on a minor public service role this year, I feel constantly committed to that particular role. Like I'm on-call all the time. And I never know when I'm going to get that call. So I feel like maybe if I just go running I can feel a little bit in control of things. Like life will be on my terms for once.

Don't worry, I'm not going to shed my responsibilities and ACTUALLY go MIA. But I may take up some sort of athleticism. (I seriously miss the courts though. Too bad intramurals are hecksta competitive though.....)